Loss, Gain & American Beauty

The thought of blogging began to slip away once I've started to make plans and go out again. But here I go again.

I'm not sure where to begin.

As said previously, I lost my sister on March 16th 2014 unexpectedly. Prior to this, I was aware that she had been very sick. Now for some reason, there was one particular question that came to mind. "What if she died?" I did feel bad for thinking that, I just couldn't help it. However, I assumed that the odds would be against it. But the Lord proved me wrong. By surprise, I took it calmly with an open heart. I didn't really cry. There was this peace that I couldn't explain -- and that was the thing.

As a child, the thought of loss scared the crap out of me (to be straight forward). It depressed me. It confused me. And to this, I also admit, I couldn't understand why someone would be willing to put themselves in a situation where they could potentially lose their life. Life was comfortable for me, and why would I want to give that up. Of course, I was a 21st century/well-to-do California kid who didn't see the need to care that much about anything important, really.

"You never know how much you really believe anything until its truth or falsehood becomes a matter of life and death to you" -- C.S. Lewis

After you've lost just about everything, your entire belief system is put to the test. As one who believes in God, my faith essentially revealed itself to me. In short, the need to worry about death itself became less important than the concern for the present, for to me it was understood, through faith, that there is life after death. Therefore, good will abound after tribulation.

(Of course, that would depend on personal opinion and one's overall worldview.)

Still,

I believe it reveals the beauty of life. 

Which reminds me. This film may be a bit off-topic, but it has become my favorite movie:

American Beauty.

The story follows a series of unfortunate events that lead up to the death of the cynical Lester Burnham (Kevin Spacey). However, through his unhappy life, he is redeemed and recognizes that the beauty of life surpasses all the misfortunes he and everyone else has gone through in their lifetime. 

That barely touches the surface of the movie, but I leave you to watch it for yourself.

Plus, never deny a chance to see Kevin Spacey -- he's a wonderful man.

Hopefully, that last bit was of some relevance to my post. Oh well. 

Happy Summer, Monica(: